How Gossip Destroys Community

"If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand. And if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand." (Mark 3:24-25)

Though originally spoken by Jesus in response to the blasphemous accusations the Pharisees were leveling against Him, this well-known and time-tested aphorism can be applied by us today who have entered into God's kingdom by repentance and faith in Christ.

Jesus makes it clear (v.26) that even Satan understands this principle, which is why we should not be surprised that his most cunning attacks against Christ's church are calculated to undermine and erode the unity and peace of Christ's people who comprise it.

One of the fiercest agents in the disintegration of the blood-bought unity and community of the saints is gossip. Which is why we as Christ's people must do everything we can to not only avoid it, but ultimately to "put it to death" by the Spirit (cf. Rom. 8:13) as we seek to "make every effort to maintain the unity and bonds of peace that the Spirit has wrought among us" (Eph. 4:3, my paraphrase).

As OT scholar Tremper Longman says, "As is typical of foolish speech, spreading rumors destroys relationships and thus community."

This is precisely what the OT sage Solomon says in Proverbs 16:28:

         "The perverse produce conflict,
              and gossips separate intimate friends."

When gossip is removed from the situation, community is enhanced:

         "For lack of wood the fire goes out,
              and where there is no whisperer,
                     quarreling ceases."  (26:20)

Gossiping spreads information behind people's backs, not to help but rather to damage their reputations. It does not matter whether or not what is said is true: it is the intention and timing of the speech that is so damaging and reprehensible.

Until the gospel becomes a more delicious "morsel" to us (see Proverbs 18:8), we will never be able to say "no" to it (see Titus 2:15, NIV). And so the only way to slay gossip is by faith in the gospel.

Which is the very remedy Paul gives us in the book of Ephesians:

        "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths,
             but only such as is good for building up,
          as fits the occasion,
             that it may give grace to those who hear." (4:29)

How they communicated to - and about - one another in community was but one of the many ways the believers in Ephesus were to communally "walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which they had been called" (4:1) in a response of gratitude to how Christ has "walked" for them (chapters 1-3).

One of the most crucial ways we are to be "imitators of God" (5:1) is how we use our tongues towards others. When we use our tongues to tear down instead of build up, Paul says that we "grieve the Holy Spirit of God" (4:30).

Rather, with our lives as well as our lips, and in view of God's mercies towards us in Christ (Rom. 12:1), we are called to continually strive to be kind to one another and tenderhearted (Eph. 4:31). "Walking in love" (5:2) means "speaking in love" (4:15), which says Paul, reflects Christ's "fragrant offering when He sacrificed Himself to God."

This is the mind of Christ (Phil. 2:5): to esteem others as more important than ourselves (2:3). When we have this mind, we - like Jesus - will seek to build others up for their good, rather than tear them down for our 'glory.'

How we speak to one another reflects the condition of our own hearts (Mark 7:21-23).

Do you gossip much? It's because your heart has not comprehended "the breadth and length and height and depth of Christ's love for you" (Eph. 3:15-19).

So go back to the gossip and let Christ's death on the cross for your sins, and His resurrection for your justification (see Rom. 4:25), recapture your affections afresh.

Let us, in the words of wise Solomon,

     "Above all else guard our hearts,
           for our heart determines the course of our lives" (Prov. 4:23, NLT)

Why? Because Jesus said that our communal love for one another is not merely a fruit of the gospel, but an actual expression of it (see John 13:34-35; 17:20-23).

Father, help us to guard our hearts by the gospel. And help us put gossip to death by the gospel. May the love of Christ captivate and control our lips as well as our lives. May the love of Your Son be clearly evidenced and effused in our lives, that the world may see and savor our Savior. Be glorified "in the church and in Christ Jesus, throughout all generations" (Eph. 3:21). Amen.

In Christ's Name, and for His glory to the ends of the earth,
pastor ryan